Acceptance


While growing up, I have always been exact opposite of socially accepted* levels in school, college, career, and in every other choice I have made. It was so against the acceptance levels, that I fought body image issues through out my school and teenage. I was trapped in the vicious cycle of self doubt till the mid twenties. And I think I surprised myself, let alone others, with my ability for lacking confidence till the early thirties! That does not mean, now I am a super confident person! But those who have confidence issues, will know, from lacking confidence to knowing that you lack confidence, itself is a great progress! 

It isn't difficult to guess how hard self-acceptance is, for a person who's always tried to fit in and then disappointed oneself over and over again. It becomes a cake walk when you stop trying to fit in! And here's what I have learnt the hard way, the difficult part isn't actually the action to stop trying to fit in, but in making that decision! It is extremely hard to tell yourself "It is okay to not be like ---!" That is where you need the courage, the foresight of the consequences of your choice and really knowing that by choosing the other way will make you happy!

Once it is your choice, you don't need others to accept it. Plus, it was a choice for happiness and not fitting in! The feeling of fulfilment can never make anyone regret that choice. You see, how the cycle of doubt transforms into the path towards fulfilment? So instead of saying "I don't care!", it is better to say "I do care! --- For myself!"

* Social acceptance has very little to do with psychology in general. It evaluates a fish by its ability to climb trees and a monkey by its ability to swim; making both feel like losers! 

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