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It’s Never Too Late

There is a quiet myth many parents carry that growth has a deadline. That repair must happen early, or not at all. That once a child reaches a certain age, the window closes.

It doesn’t.

Parenting is not confined to childhood years or legal milestones. It is a living relationship, one that continues to evolve as long as there is willingness, awareness, and love.

Whether your child is five, fifteen, or thirty five, they are still watching you. Not with the wide-eyed dependence of early years, but with a deeper curiosity of how you handle discomfort, how you take responsibility, how you respond when something old surfaces and asks to be healed.

Every time you pause instead of reacting, something shifts. Every time you choose honesty over authority, safety deepens. Every time you say, “I’m learning too,” a new pattern is born. Healing does not require perfect timing. It requires presence.

This book was written for parents who feel they may have arrived late to awareness. For those who believe they should have known better earlier. For those carrying regret, guilt, or the quiet ache of “if only.”

Change does not lose its power with time. In fact, it often gains depth. When a parent grows later in life, the impact can be profound, because it shows that evolution is possible at any age. Because it teaches children, grown or growing, that repair is not a one-time event, but a lifelong skill.

Parenting is not about raising a child perfectly. It is about remaining in a relationship with yourself, and with them. And if you are wondering whether it still matters, whether your effort will still be felt, whether awareness now can undo years of silence or misunderstanding, this book is here to remind you exactly that.

It is never too late.

p.s. Gift yourself or someone you love today- Safety Nesters to Empty Nesters

It's not that complicated!

If you doubt when all seems great,  

Know what you see, can be manipulated!

Truth is always stranger than fiction, 

Because your gut can sense what is hidden!

Looks can be deceptive, 

Words can be fake!

It is hard to simplify matters, 

Because everyone loves to complicate!

All the stories you've heard,

Everything you were told to be true, 

Can fall apart with one simple question -

Is there more to what meets the eye, even a tiny clue?

 

It takes courage to question what you hear,

It takes strength to revisit what you see!

It is tiring to stand up against the wrong,

But standing up for what is right, will set you free!

So do not ignore your gut feelings

Never doubt your gut's doubts, 

It is your guiding star

When everything is confusing and dark! 

If I am a memory

 

Our meeting was a stroke of serendipity,

There was no history neither familiarity.

Yet we bonded like a house on fire!

So if I am a memory, remember me for the fire! 

Days became months and months became years together,

Even the distances in miles kept increasing forever. 

A lot changed in this time but never our connection!

So if I am a memory, remember me for the connection!

Shared moments in life make fond memories,

But life in itself is full of bitter sweet symphonies.

We have our share of hurt but we sure have more happy quirks!

So if I am a memory, remember me for the happy quirks!

I see you, I hear you and I understand you,

Not for an imaginary version of you, but you being you.

Not because I need you or I want you, but because I choose you! 

So if I am a memory, remember me for choosing you! 

Don't let your children drench in your storm!

 

As parents, we are supposed to share our calm with our children when they are in an overwhelming chaos, not add to their chaos! Very often children are punished for simply being little versions of human beings. How quickly a child gets dismissed for having a meltdown and criticised for expressing what they feel, breaks my heart every single time I see a child go through it. "Shut up! Keep your voice down! That's nothing! Why are you behaving like a baby? You are creating a scene!"... It might sound outrageous when you read these sentences in a post, but you will be shocked how often children are shut down with such phrases, some are downright bad things to say even to an adult! What is worse, the tone, the attitude and the shaming that goes along with this is so bad, that you know for real, it can only have a bad impact on the kids at the receiving end. There is no version of this where the children would come on top of this as good people. What is certain though is that, emotionally damaged people groom emotionally damaged children into another generation of emotionally damaged parents, and this vicious cycle continues! 

Any parent who doesn't do that, is by all means a parent who's doing the basics of parenting right! I am so proud of you for being different! I wish, your kind of parents were in majority! But unfortunately, it is not so! For those of you, who tend to do this, on behalf of your little ones, let me tell you, your children need you to listen to them with the intention of understanding and not disciplining! Just like when you see someone drowning, you save them from drowning, not teach them to swim! In that moment of complete meltdown, your children need you to share your calm with them and not reprimand them for having a meltdown. I promise you, they aren't doing anything on purpose. For all I know, the history behind their supposed bad behaviour will only break your heart. And if you do this because your parents did this to you, then my dear parent, it is high time you break this cycle, because clearly, its not working! The more you try to discipline your children to behave in this way, the more they misbehave, right? Right! (Sorry, but you know I am right!)

Children mirror what they see! So, when you find them being insufferable, they've seen someone closely (probably you) being insufferable! Very often you'll realise your complaints about your children are nothing but your behaviours that they are mirroring! It starts with you! You want meltdowns to disappear? Get a magic wand! Be realistic and deploy common sense! That's not happening, even you as adults have meltdowns. You want your children to regulate their meltdowns in better ways? Show them how it is done! Catch yourself when you have a meltdown and allow your kids to point out when you are having a meltdown. You'll be shocked how quickly your children will learn to regulate themselves and even you in constructive ways. Don't forget to thank your children later! 

Which dog should I get as my first pet and what to expect?

 FnAQ: I have a 5 year old daughter who has been behind me for over a year to bring home a pet dog. I have never had a pet dog before but I love dogs in general. Which dog should I get as my first pet and what to expect? 

Short Answer: Any breed that is suitable for therapy will be the best option as your first pet dog especially with a child. Depending on your home size, select a suitable breed. You can Goggle it, but for your reference: Golden retriever (most recommended), Labrador retriever, German Shepherd, French Bulldog, Beagle, Pug, etc. 

Long Answer: Bringing in a pet is like brining home a child. You will need to do a lot of care taking and parenting before the pet becomes a part of the family. Do not go by how pets are portrayed in movies or in books, it's fiction after all! If you are willing to bring in a pet dog for your daughter's wish, you should be prepared for doing all the legwork and model how to take care of someone whose life depends on your care taking. The basic things you'll need to have before you bring in your pet home are as follow:

- Vet in your locality for vaccinations and checkups

- Dog food & bowl

- Bed 

- Leash & collar

- Dog shampoo and brush

- Poop collecting bags or tool and pee pads

- Chew toys and edible sticks (puppies bite all the time while teething)

- At least one ball 

You will immediately need to start toilet training and engage in basic training of commands. If you can afford, it is advisable to hire a professional dog trainer for your own learning. If not, you will find a lot of tutorials online. But do all of this before the dog comes home. All in all, it is a great thing that you want to bring in a pet dog! 

Hope this helps! 

Lots of love!  

'Click' is not enough

 

Shortest tragedy? "We just click!"

Ladies and Gentlemen! Boys and Girls! 

Click is not enough! (Fill in the blanks alternatives - love, align, vibe and all those feelings that we use to self negotiate! 😉)

Riddle me this: Can you tick these? 

• Good emotional regulation
• Fair conflict resolution
• Healthy stress management
• Focus on emotional and physical health
• Ability to admit mistakes and apologise
• Express and respect basic needs 
• Empathy and understanding
• Open communication

You should be able to tick these! 

End of story! "Thank you!"